Thursday, December 25, 2008

December Funnies (Part 2)

December 11, 2008

(About the show Parking Wars)
It's a show on A&E where they follow people who work at the Philadelphia Parking Authority doing various jobs - ticketing cars, booting cars, working at the impound lot. I love it. They had some guy last night who was yelling at the booters not to boot his daughters car, even after they told him they weren't going to boot it and that she needed to call the DMV to get things straightened out. At one point he made a move at the cameraman like he was going to hit him, and all I could think is "Holy shit, that is one giant pissed off retard."
The PPA isn't exactly known for being friendly, so it's kinda odd seeing them as people doing their jobs instead of marauding pirates that rob the general population.

December 12, 2008

(About looking for the movies Zombie Strippers and Lost Boys: The Tribe)

Two things I'll have to look for on Pirate Bay. :-)
Actually three things if you include swap 2 - Electric Puke and Poo

My friend Dena: I could have turned out like one of those bad SciFi movies where everyone in it thinks they're all doing something oscar-worthy.
Me: I thought you liked Star Trek
My friend Dena: Not particularly :) Where in the world would you get the idea that I did?
Me: I dunno. I just kind of assumed. Which made an ass out of you and me. But then again I'm always an ass, so now you're like me.


December 16, 2008

My friend Ellie: Yeah. I'm just ranting. I hear it's en vogue. :)
Me: Ranting is a mildly successful mid-90's R&B girl group?

(About a Romanian blood transfusion patient)
I just got an image of Count Dracula with one of those baseball hats with the dual straw thingies and 2 pints of blood strapped to the top.

December 22, 2008

Mold. It's good for your spores.

This is why putting "regular Joe American" in power is a bad idea.

Because regular Joe American is a fucking moron.

I just got back from a work party. It was ok, except my co-workers were there.

December 23, 2008

(About chihuahuas)
There is nothing ok about a breed of dog that it's sole purposes in life are to:

a.) constantly make yipping sounds
b.) piss all over everything
3.) shake like a crackhead

Yeah it's great being interested in a girl only to hear her talk about going to Disney with her husband and kids, or about how supportive her boyfriend is, or how she'd date you if you didn't have kids. Why sometimes I have to pinch myself just so I don't think I'm dreaming.

This makes my pee pee sad.

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